I have heard that many writers are working now on the prostitution business due to this strike. I've also heard that now they are working as prostitutes, they feel more authentic, honest, free and most of all, creatively challenged.

Jewish broken english joke,

There is a poor Jewish and a rich Russian about to eat. The poor Jew...he only has a couple of fish-heads to lick, while the rich Russian guy has a great piece of beef in a sandwich.
The Russian approach the Jew and ask him:
-How come you Jewish are so intelligent?
-You don't know why? It's because we eat the head of the fish.

The Russian asks him to exchange their food. The poor Jew enjoys his wonderful meal.
After they are done with the food, the Russian says:
-I have eaten the head of the fish but I don't feel more intelligent now.
-You see? Now you are getting smart.

Now make this joke your own by changing the Jewish for your own religion! It's even funnier with Greeks.


Welcome dear visitor from Latvia,

Thanks to googleanalitycs I know that I have a visitor from Latvia. I don't know if they call them Latvinians, Latvigos, Latvos or how. But I am glad that some of you visited my blog.
Welcome Latvianos!

A thought about computers,

According to my wife, as every year of the dog counts like 7 years of a person, every year of a computer is the equivalent of 20 years of a man.
She should be famous for this wonderful thought!


Spanish lessons for the gringos,

From now on, this will be a new section in my blog. The porpouse of this section will be to teach the gringos how to speak the basic spanish needed for everyday talking in LatinAmerica.
So hang on to your seat, cause this is the first lesson for the gringos!


This is a highly valuable lesson. It means:


Keep enjoying your spanish lessons for everyday talking!

Counter Strike banned,

In Brazil, the goverment just banned the video-game called Counter Strike. In a clear response to this, the US would be prohibiting the caipirinha, the song "Garota du Ipanema", and the projection of brazilian football on tv.

They couldn't do it with the brazilian soap operas. They are great!


What did Hillary do to Bill?

What did she do to him when she saw this?

When Heath Ledger died,

This guy is the editor of The Guardian, Murray Armstrong, and this is how he describes what he did when Heath Ledger died. How he changed the newspaper's cover. It's interesting:

Before the daily discussion at morning conference, another important events takes place --an autopsy of last night's work. The news section of the paper saw various changes throughout the evening. Early editions had a picture of Oscar-nominated Julie Christie on the front page, with a lead story on the Oscars occupying all of page 5. By late evening Reuters was reporting the death of Heath Ledger, who was found in his New York apartment yesterday. This item appeared in the later TV news bulletins and a photograph of the young actor replaced Julie Christie on the front page for late editions of the paper. A full report was carried inside on page 4, knocking the previous lead story there -- the £3m underspend of universities on poorer students -- on to page 5. That meant moving the previous page 5 lead on the Oscars to a smaller slot over on page 4. The page 3 story on President Putin and his new press officer was cut back for the fourth edition to make room for a later news story from New York on Apple's fears that the market for iPods may be reaching market saturation. Each page in the paper has a number of stars at the top and this tells you the last time that a change was made. The number of stars on the bottom left of the front page tell you which edition you are reading. So page 8 of the final, fifth edition of the paper, for instance, also has five stars above a story headlined Police suspect internet link to suicides. This replaced the previous page lead on the Newquay hotel fire. The science page on 12 also shows a late change for fifth edition but the stories remain the same. The page has been changed at this point either to repair a misspelling or to correct a small error or to insert new, more recent information. AL Kennedy's Costa book prize on page 14 has also been changed, this time at the fourth edition. The story and the book extract remain the same but the picture on the page has been changed for a contemporaneous one showing the author receiving the award. Over on page 15 the lead story was changed at the same time from a health-related town planning item to the news of the murder of 14-year-old Jessica Knight in Chorley.

How to make people find your blog,

I've just been told that the most important thing is the title of the entries. If you find the title that people is going to search on that white square of the google search, then your blog is going to be visited. The problem, and there is always a problem, is how to predict what this search is going to be. For this matter, I am going to post the website for a physic called Leevon Kennedy. She is mentalyst and claims to be the result of a relationship between her "mother" Marilyn Monroe and father JFK.


Brilliant writing,

My mother doesn't cook fish but she could be her.


this guy was about to eat his own leg,

Read this:


Thank god for British newspapers!

Blame the genes,

I went to a place called Johnny Rockets. While I was there, a huge couple sat in a table. When I say huge, I mean really really really huge.
My father said: -It's genetic. Do not judge them.
Me: -Genetic? They are about to eat a nasty hamburger.
Father: -It's there genes what makes them want to eat hamburgers.

I just wonder this, if you are scientist feel free to reply:
-What kind of gen is the "I want to eat nasty hamburgers?

For me it's just another justification for a wrong behavior.
"I am not a corrupt politician, it's my gens"
"I am not a sadist boss, it's my gens"
"I am not a crazy bitch, it's my gens"

If something needs to be justified, blame the genes.

Dexter and Suskind's Perfume

If you red "Perfume" by Patrick Suskind or watched "Dexter" I am sure you got emotionally involved with the main characters, even when they are mass murderers. I am not sure how it works but you get to want them to be free, you want them to escape from the law. Do you realize how powerful a story is?

What about spending this whole day thinking about profound things like this?


Those lines for the dead people on Sunday's newspaper,

I just don't get why some people write to the dead people on the newspaper. As crazy as it sounds, they probably think their death family or friends somehow receive those lines on the newspaper and their message, of course. In reality, these people don't think they are talking to the death, they just want to show or pretend they are sad for whatever reason.
Wouldn't it be great to reply those messages?
Dear family and friends: Thank you for all the nice things you've said. I love being able to talk to you this way, cause the physic was a little bit complicated due to bad signal. I miss you all. Honey, I think you could have waited a little longer to date your personal trainer. By the way, I knew it. Please when you split my money between you, remember to separate a couple of dollars to take care of my avocado tree.
I will always remember you as well, as long as you keep on posting these lines on the New York times. Love...


When I grow up I want to be Gondry II

Another new year resolution,

I am going to buy those shoes with wheels and I am going to use them everyday. I will upload a picture next week.

The new BigFoot,

According to an article I've read last week, the myth of the BigFoot is only 50 years old. Apparently, many people started to talk about him and the story, trough word of mouth, tipped. I was wondering if I could replicate this with the help of other bloggers, and to create a new myth for the world.
If you are interested, it's very simple:
1-send me a comment with your blog's address so I can track it.
2-And published something like this between April and May 2008:
"I was hunting on the woods and all of the sudden I turn around and there it was...it wasn't a man, nor a gorilla, nor that stupid myth the bigfoot. I don't know what it was, It was hairy but bold on the back of the head, and what worried me the most, it had a giant "thing". You know, a dick but the size of snake".
3-On family meetings or dinners with friends or even at work just refer at him like "bigdick".

Collaborate. Will do it together!


Blog policy,

Now the companies are trying to advertise on blogs, to put some money to "influence" on blogger's opinion. Apparently, people don't trust them anymore. They only trust us! As a blogger myself I want to set this very clear from the beginning of this wonderful journey of blogging: If any of you tries to give me some money to make me say something that I don't agree...I would greatly appreciate it.
Keep on trusting me dear reader cause I speak the truth (what a sentence for the history of blogs).



I just got into Google trends and you won't believe this but according to them, people is searching insanely for the word "mycologist". What the fuck? Is it a new highly contagious fungus attacking the human?
We humans are weird.

Grabbing newspapers from a can trash in a hotel of miami beach,

Hey, the title almost tell it everything. The things is, I am in Miami on vacations.
This morning I went to throw the garbage and there it was: A copy of the Miami herald barely touched and with no stickiness or dirt around. So I said, what the hell. This room must cost 300 a night, but it's really nice to grab something from the trash can.
I didn't like it editorialwise, but how I enjoyed it because of reading it for free!


Sad numbers,

I am thinking of shutting down this blog. So if you are one of the 14 persons who got in, please send your support! google analytics has given me a strong punch on the face.
Now you can cure me.
Many thanks.

The team of Broken English.

ps: I never thought of shutting down.

Scriptwriters strike,

Dear Scriptwriters,
I just want to be with you guys in this moment. I am dying to see some new episodes of a couple of shows. And I want you to be recognized about all of your wonderful work, with plenty of money.
Having said that, I hope that the writers from Dawson's creek, Beverly Hills, Melrose Place, Ghost whisperer, third rock from the sun and many more...I hope they don't get a penny!

Stealing from Larry David,

On an episode of "Curb your enthusiasm" someone approaches him and tells him he looks young. So he replies: "I am rotting inside". I thought this was brilliant and I wanted to steal it.
It's been 3 weeks from that episode, and nobody told me how young I look.
I am not confident I will use it anytime soon.


When I grow up I want to be Gondry

Databases and Spam!

I just received a spam that said: Enlarge your penis. I am kind of worried. I think someone put me in a database of small-dick-dudes. And that is not my bigger worry, but: How did they know?

If you are one of this people

Who likes to be the first in everything. Now you have the chance to discover this blog and tell the world you saw it first.

Jenna Jameson retiring from Porn

I am amazed by how professional the porn industry has become. As in any other career, when you are done with it you get to give a speech! And to be honest, I'd rather hear Jena Jameson retirement speech than any other from any regular industry. It's just more interesting.

the property of an idea

I had an idea for an incredible post. It came to me when I was talking to my wife. Actually, she is the one that "had" the idea and told it to me. But would she be able to get that idea if she wasn't talking to me? Is she really the owner of that idea? I might have been the inspiration! At least I want some credit. But she said: I have my own blog, I am going to write that on my blog. So I said, now I got to talk about the property of an idea. And I completely forgot what that idea was. Fuck.


I like this and I want you to like it too!

It's too long, you don't have to watch the whole thing.

This kind of people,

There is this kind of people. People who doesn't know how to recognize a story that deserves to be told. So they go telling stories with nothing interesting on them. I just hope that I don't belong to this people. Should I remove the last entry? It's just a silly conversation with my brother. I will leave it there for a couple of comments.

on giving books

My wife and I decided to start giving books as gifts for birthdays, christmas or whatever reason. This would be our grain of rice to make a better world (bullshit). Lately, it turned out not a great idea.
Last year I bought my brother one of the books that really made me laugh. Probably the funniest book I've ever read. It's called "A long way down".
A couple of weeks ago, we were talking and I go like: Hey, what did you think about "A long way down?" and he answers: It's on the car, I didn't read it.
P: Why didn't you read it?
V: Cause I am not into fiction.
P: Oh, you are not into fiction. That's sad because you are missing beautiful stories.
V: Yeah...I am not into beautiful stories either.

At this point of the conversation, and because he is a scientist, I assumed that he was only reading science.

P: So, this book would be a great opportunity for you to rediscover the pleassure of reading fiction.
V: I just told you that I didn't want to read fiction.

But I was a little bit mad. Let's suppose that is not a book, but a shirt. And this guy, my own bro, is telling me that he is not interested in using my shirt and he is leaving it resting in a messy dirty stinky car.

V: You should have given me a book that I would want to read. Not a book that YOU want ME to read.
P: But a book that you want to read is a book that you can buy on your own. It doesn’t involve a nice cultural transaction of experiences. My gift means: I had an incredible time reading this and I want the same for you.
V: That’s where you are wrong, if you wanted me to have a great time you should have thought of a book that I would love to read.

Point taken. I realized two things:
1-When you give a book you don’t want them just to enjoy, you want them to enjoy the same way yo do. Is this selfish? I don’t know.
2-My brother is going to sell his messy dirty stinky car with an amazing book. What a great deal a car with “A long way down” on the back.

My friends, this days I am sending some copies of “The tipping Point” by Malcolm Gladwell.

This is my second entry,

Writing the first entry is just too much pressure for me.